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My eyes and nose are all puffy. We were supposed to go see "Ghost Rider" tonight but first Adam was being all :( and then they decided not to run the shuttles because we're under a tornado watch, or warning, whichever is worse. I can never remember. I'm just waiting for that "WRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH DYING CAT NOISE WRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" to wake us up tonight.

I should be working on my research paper, but I have no idea what I'm arguing/presenting yet. It's supposed to be on TS Eliot's "The Wasteland" but otherwise I have no idea.

Why the heck does iTunes have "bones" and "stacked" and "the OC" but not "House"? I mean, are they STUPID or something? Everyone watches house. :P
BECAUSE I FORGOT LAST NIGHT.

HOUSE AND WILSON. TOTALLY ON A DATE. OMG YES YES YES THEY TOTALLY WERE GOING ON A FREAKIN' DATE. AND HOUSE MESSING WITH CUDDY'S DATE AND CUDDY BEING ALL :( WHEN HER GUY LEFT AND HOUSE "...YOU'RE NOT WEARING A BRA"

AND THEN LIKE CHASE AND CAMERON. "So I think maybe we should have sex."
"...um, that makes sense." AND CHASE'S SEXY, SEXY HAT AND YOU COULD SEE HIS NECK AND THIS IS A NEW FIXTURE IN EVERY EPISODE NOW OR I WILL KIDNAP HUGH LAURIE AND GIVE HIM TO VICTORIA TO BE HER SEX SLAVE (MIGHT DO THAT ANYWAY... ONLY BE MY SEX SLAVE. WHATEVER.) FLAIL FLAIL FLAIL

and let's totally ignore how sad it is that I'm fixated on fictional characters' love lives while I sit alone-ish on valentine's day. I am wearing my sparkly green headband and nothing can get me down.
I fail at life and wit. However, I am currently writing a totally cracktastic CSI/James Bond AU crossover in which Greg fills the role of Bond Babe. Yes, really. No, I don't know what goes on in my mind either. FLAIL.

Besides becoming re-addicted to my first second third love, CSI (as you may have guessed from the above), I have rapidly become obsessed with house. HOW CAN EVERYONE ON THAT SHOW BE SO PRETTY AND DAMAGED AND *SPAZ SPAZ FLAIL*??? Really. Combining those things after a day-long shared folder raid, my roommate and I have come up with the injoke "IT'S NEVER LUPUS... because I'm Grissom."

Additionally we have concluded that the Lady Heather episodes are very wrong because even with my penchant for old(er) men, Grissom having sex is just.wrong. adfjkkl;

This entry brought to you by creme soda and s'mores poptarts.

AVATAR. ONE MONTH MORE AND YOU SHALL RETURN!





I need Chase icons.

Feb. 3rd, 2007

It's official, January sucks. This month I have:

-Missed our first inner-dorm visitation
-Found out that, at the end of February, my best friend in the world is moving 400 miles away (from pascagoula. I haven't mapquest'd from columbus yet)
-Gotten into a major wreck that totalled on of my family's vans
-Along with the rest of the school, got smacked on the hand and totally broken by the loss of internet.
-Started listening to Linkin Park AND Nickleback. (THIS IS CLEARLY THE WORST ITEM ON THE LIST AS IT INDICATES I HAVE LOST MY EVERLOVING MIND. AND POSSIBLY MY TASTE. ><) My roommate seems to think that Eminem is next; she's wrong. Very, very wrong.

The wreck, while it didn't seriously hurt anyone, shook me up pretty bad. It was Friday before last, my Aunt Brenda was driving with me in the passenger seat and Grandma in the back. We were on our way home from Columbus, on this little two-lane part of '57 (actually it was State Line Road, which is a detour off '57 so you don't have to drive through Leakesville). There's no light, nobody around, and one minute we're talking and then we turn a corner and I see headlights.

"He's in our lane," I say, totally stating the very obvious.
"We're going to wreck," Says Aunt Brenda, because obvious-stating appears to be an inherited trait.

BAM! A big king-cab truck takes the front left side paneling totally off. It like crushed the bumper, took off the wheel, shattered the window and took the outside of the door off, destroyed the column that held the driver's belt in place. Had it been a few inches over, it would have killed Aunt Brenda. Luckily we were all fine, albeit cold for an hour and a half while we waited for her son to drive from Lucedale (is that how it's spelled? hell if I know) to pick us up. My mom says I'm only allowed to come home for extended now. DX

As for the internet thing, that's a story for when it isn't roomcheck time.

journal change....

yeah changed the layout to one of the premade s2 ones. If only the really awesomescause ones weren't paid only! *tears* And I can't remember how to change the name of the journal... fudge.

Winter Formal was Saturday, it was fun; picspam when film is developed. Now I just have to survive MY VERY FIRST FINALS AT MSMS.... whaaaaah.

*sigh*

Yeah so now I'm hanging out in my room, alone, while everyone else either goes to the basketball game or the play. I'm feeling a little anti-social and panic-y today, okay?! ><

Today's trip to the library was pretty much a total bust. I confirmed some of the info the librarian had told me, and found out a little bit more about TN (who's freakin' journal I have), but otherwise everything I found was a bust. I got really excited because I found a newspaper reference for Sarah Tabb (main person) but then it turned out just to be her name in a loooong list of others who were paid small amounts of money from the city council's treasury. It just said 'do' for reason why. D:

So now I'm just working on a doll and avoiding my paper, finals, homework, etc.

and it rained, it was nothing really new

This is a bit of a self-indulgent entry: a year plus afterward I am finally writing a bit on Hurricane Katrina. Why? Because on Jimmy Buffet's new album, "Take the Weather With You," he sang a song dedicated to the victims -- I hate that word, by the way. Victims people who've been murdered or raped ... something that happened to ME doesn't seem like it should have VICTIMS -- and it pretty much captured what was necessary to do, to survive. We had to move on.

After the storm hit I wrote here about the immediate circumstances of my family and friends but I've never really dealt with any kind of grief over the subject. That's because I don't have any, not really -- the circumstances were too overwhelming for me to feel anything, even after nearly fifteen months. The number of people that died, the sheer unfairness and tragedy and fear that the even caused will never really be real to me because in those first few days I worked so hard to block it all out.

I slept a lot, prayed a lot, and cried a lot while we waited it out in Pensacola -- near enough for there to be strong winds and rain but not near enough to experience the terror of being in the middle of it as some of my friend were. I remember little things, like the pattern of the hotel's comforter and what my Nana was wearing and the fact that my baby cousin was sick. We stayed in a room with this huge window that covered a whole wall side-to-side and across the street from it was a place where they kept cinder blocks, piles of them big enough that the adults in our family were worried for our safety should the winds kick up more than they did. A power converter blew above the window and we were afraid it would cause a fire -- as it was, it knocked out the power and forced my mother to flee to the hospital with my two special-needs brothers, who could not handle the heat. The entire time, as the weather worsened in Florida we all knew that it was worse in Pascagoula where my father had stayed with every other police officer. Luckily his phone company was the only one whose towers stayed up consistently, and we could talk to him though the sound was spotty and it was hard to get through the clogged lines. The Pascagoula Police Department remained active throughout the storm, unlike every other department in the area. When their generators flooded, they dragged a motorcycle upstairs to use it's radio for dispatch. We talked to my dad a lot on the phone, teased him about how much he loved eating MRE's (he being one of the few people on earth who "knew how good they were" before the storm) and how he was getting to swim so much while we were trapped inside. We took a deep breath and moved on.

After the winds died down a bit we moved from the hotel to a friend of a friend's, a house on an army base with a generator. The first night we stayed, there were over forty people in a four bedroom house; that number dwindled down as the weeks passed. The big screen TV in the living room stayed on the news constantly, filled with images (mostly of New Orleans, to everyone's annoyance). We watched as they recovered bodies, as they condemned black "looters" and praised white "scavengers," as account after tragic account played over and over. We all became over-saturated with the black horror of the situation, repeated endlessly with no facts about anyone we knew. Eventually dad located all of the family that had remained in Pascagoula, including my stubborn grandmother. I don't know how many times I tried to call my best friend; I forced my father to ride by her house and check several times until we finally reached her. We all breathed out when we knew family was safe, and looked toward fixing everything now broken.

My sixteenth birthday came and went, and while it was nothing like what I had expected and hoped for I will never forget the birthday party thrown for me by my family and attended by people I had only known for a week. I hadn't expected a party at all -- and there we were, living two hours from home, after one of the worst national disasters in the US hit our home and we were all eating birthday cake and laughing. People have birthday parties, we had a birthday party, it was moving on.

After a month, we came back to Jackson County but not the Coast; instead, our family stayed with my Uncle James and Aunt Cathy. Despite happily having no children of their own, they opened their home to six of us loud rambunctious heathens and we all got along well for the most part. My mother shielded us from the destruction back home, mostly, and I had been back a week before I actually got to see town -- it's something I'll never forget, choking back tears and looking away as my siblings pointed out each new fantastic site of twisted buildings or roofs without houses or homes with nothing but supports left standing. If I live forever, I'll never understand the fascination people had with driving around the passable roads, staring at the battered remains south of highway 90, especially down the beach where there was very little but foundations. It makes me sick sitting here typing it and yet I know many who wasted valuable gas to cruise around and rubberneck other peoples' disasters. Anything to take their minds off their own troubles, I suppose.

After three months of living in the north of the county with our relatives, we moved back home into FEMA-supplied trailers. It was good that I had grown used to cramped quarters and zero privacy in Florida, because the space in those trailers are very limited despite the fact that our family received a bigger one than most. Despite the fact that they became the butt of every joke for quiet a while -- it got old, fast -- the trailers were nothing to complain about because we could have been living in TENTS, in the cold weather and later grueling spring and summer of Mississippi. Everyone, living in tent or trailer or the top floor of their house, learned to deal though -- or else they left, as my parents strongly contemplated. The kids of Pascagoula struggled desperately to catch up while accommodating students from New Orleans and other coastal places that funneled into our relatively-undamaged.

Slowly, as schools opened back up and business returned things swung back to normal and there didn't seem to be this big gaping hole where reality should be. We put back together lives, new and different and maybe not as great as they once were but they were LIVES, we were still LIVING, and we were grateful through all the teasing whining and catty fights over the most comfortable shelf-bed. We breathed in, breathed out, and moved on because it was the only thing we could do.

Breath In, Breath Out, Move On (lyrics)Collapse )

name meme!

1. YOUR SPY NAME: (middle name and current street name)
Rebekah Larchmont

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)
Jackie Tootsie Roll (...WTF)

3. YOUR RAP NAME (first initial of first name, first three or four letters of your last name)
H CUNN

4. YOUR GAMER TAG: (a favorite color, a favorite animal)
Orange Lion

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (aunt's name, city where you were born)
Brenda Pascagoula

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)
Cun Dav Sop (sounds sorta dirty 0______o)

7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your favorite character's last name spelled backwards)
Hakeber Akkos (Whoa, I kind of like that one)

8. PORN STAR NAME: (first pet's name, the street you grew up on)
Banana Freirson (...whut. I would so not watch that. XD)

9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automobile your dad drives)
The Orange Chevy (sounds more like my CARS name.)

10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME: (first name of the main character in the last film you watched, last food you ate)
Hercules Pecans (would so get beat up at school, yo. *I* would steal his lunch money. NOTE TO SELF: Stop with the disney overdose!)

Tags:

aaaaaaaarg.

Herman melville, die in a fire.

I never update this thing...

Tales. Is. Eating. My. Life. Plus I have English and Shakespeare papers due on the same day (next Tuesday), and UE one is on something I haven't even read. To think I left my friends and a place in the top ten for this. But don't let me whine, I love it. Why? Because it's NERD SCHOOL.

I've been keeping my fannishness... shall we say on the down-low? since I got here. Reinventing myself and all that. Anyways, in art class I'm painting an avatar T-shirt with the Blue Spirit on it. I lied and said it was a Kabuki theater mask; apparently several students in the other classes have pointed out what it was an asked if I could paint THEM one. Then yesterday in foundations we were talking about what we were thinking about... and emily said "kakashi!" I may or may not have cheered; there were definitely others clapping. NERD SCHOOL, man. Less than three.

Today was my tales library day. It's really cold and windy outside here, but it was still a nice walk because I wore my big jacket and gloves. On the way back to campus I stopped at the shell station and got some really good hot chocolate... it was really nice.